- sumtimes i tink back to the time when i officially started chasing zhu...
i mean, i took notice of him n i started likin for like 10yrs oreadi?
bt tis has alwaes been sumting tat I KNOW
bt nt sumting tat ppl ard mi knows...
nt even my parents, nt even my best frens...
den i started tinkin back... why did i start?
i came to a conclusion the other day while tinkin bout tis...
DENIAL
it was sumting tat happened a few yrs back...
on new years day...
i was still aslp... n 1 phone call changed my life...
n the struggle to accept the truth
the struggle to get pass everything
the struggle to re-accept him...
yup.. he messed up my life...
i dun understand n i din wan to at tat point of time
he tried to tok to mi, bt i din gif him a chance to start..
i was so emotionally drained that i had to haf sumting
sumting for mi to fall back on
i turned to zhu...
well... i'm glad tat i had tat push
=) itz a luv hate situation realli...
i realli feel like kickin zhu's ass sumtimes...
like SERIOUSLY
tat was my push..
n this is whr i m now...
zhu was my one n onli...
n i'm proud to sae tat...
bcoz of wat i'm goin thru...
sumtimes i'm nonchalant
to frenz... to family... to zhu...
i'm too drained to care... sumtimes...
i feel bad...
bt i cant help it...
i've been disappointed
i've been misunderstood
i've been stabbed in the back so bad
i've been let down
alot of bad tings happened to mi
n none of u out there noes
i heard stories of ppl's lifes...
n i'm sorry tat bad tings happened to u
bt there're worse tings tat happen to other ppl...
i prep talk myself sumtimes...
bt...
letz juz sae i'm nt listenin to myself v much!
abrupt way to end my entry?
hahaha! itz bloggin!!! i'm still alive!
wait for the nxt chapter in my life!
xD
`aPriL WaS HeRe aT 10:51 PM